Sometimes I'm Tired of Taking the High Road

Can I be honest?

Sometimes...

I'm tired of being the nice one.

Now before anyone misunderstands me, let me explain.

I'm not saying I want to become mean.

I'm not saying I'm going to start matching people's energy.

I'm not saying I'm going to stop treating people with kindness and respect.

I won't.

Because that's who I am.

But there are days...

I get tired of always taking the high road.

I Have Thoughts Too

People often mistake kindness for the absence of difficult emotions.

Trust me.

I have thoughts.

Some of the things that cross my mind when someone is disrespectful...

I'd clutch my own pearls if I actually said them out loud.

Sometimes I want to respond with the same tone they used with me.

Sometimes I want to point out every flaw in their argument.

Sometimes I want to remind them exactly who they're talking to.

But I don't.

Not because I don't think it.

Because I know better than to act on it.

Kind Doesn't Mean Passive

Let's clear something up.

Being kind doesn't mean I'm a pushover.

I'm not.

I can be dismissive.

I can withdraw.

I can remove people from my personal space without losing a minute of sleep.

I've learned that access to me is a privilege, not a right.

Boundaries have made my adult life much quieter than it used to be.

Most of the chaos I experienced when I was younger simply doesn't exist anymore because I no longer allow everyone into my life.

That isn't being cold.

That's being intentional.

The Frustrating Part

Here's where the struggle comes in.

Sometimes it feels like the other person just...

Gets away with it.

They were disrespectful.

They were rude.

They raised their voice.

They crossed a line.

And I walk away.

I go for a walk.

I meditate.

I breathe.

I journal.

I process it.

I do exactly what I teach my clients to do.

Meanwhile...

They're probably going about their day without a second thought.

And if I'm honest...

That can feel unfair.

Self-Control Isn't Weakness

One of the biggest misconceptions about emotional regulation is that calm people don't get angry.

We do.

We absolutely do.

The difference is that we've learned not every emotion deserves an audience.

Not every thought deserves a microphone.

Not every urge deserves a response.

That's not suppression.

That's self-control.

And self-control isn't weakness.

It's strength directed inward instead of outward.

The Older I Get...

The older I get, the less interested I am in winning arguments.

I'm more interested in protecting my peace without sacrificing my character.

Because the moment I become the person I would later apologize for...

Nobody wins.

Not me.

Not them.

Mirror Work

I don't always want to be the bigger person.

Sometimes I want someone else to apologize first.

Sometimes I want consequences to be immediate.

Sometimes I want justice to arrive on my timeline.

But here's the question I ask myself.

If I react the way I want to right now...

Will I be proud of that version of me tomorrow?

Usually...

The answer is no.

So I choose differently.

Not because it's easy.

Because it's consistent with the person I'm trying to become.

Final Thought

I'm still working toward a place where other people's disrespect doesn't disturb my peace.

I'm not there yet.

Sometimes it still stings.

Sometimes I replay conversations in my head.

Sometimes I imagine all the things I wish I had said.

But then I remember something I tell my clients all the time.

Character isn't revealed by what you think.

It's revealed by what you choose to do with those thoughts.

Anyone can be kind when they're treated well.

The real test comes when someone gives you every reason not to be.

And while I don't always enjoy taking the high road...

I've never regretted protecting my character.

Because at the end of the day, I have to live with my choices—not theirs.